A light crackle from the exhaust let off as my GT3 glided to a halt at the valet. The well lit entrance to our new headquarters placed an aurora-like glow around my green paint. There shouldn’t have been a nervous bone in my body but all I could feel was chills. It was more crowded in the conference hall than I ever expected. I could see a crowd standing around not too far from the bar, and right in the midst of it was Jack Baruth replaying a story of shenanigans in his Audi S5, he spotted me and stopped in the middle of his sentence.
“Illiana! I haven’t seen you around, how is everything?”
“Well. I’ve been working hard as you can see.”
“Oh you’re the one responsible for this event!”
“Yep. They couldn’t find anybody better to make this place a venue instead of an office.”
“I’m definitely having fun, by the way I want you to meet someone. Paul…”
In that instant the random black suit standing near us turned to display the face of the man I left in front of that green house. I tried not to let my face drop, but I think my face settled somewhere between afraid and humiliated.
“Hey dude, meet Illiana. She’s like a test-driving publicist or some shit like that, never quite figured it out.”
“Nice to see you again.”
“You guys know each other?”
I didn't really know how to answer that question without saying we fucked a couple of times. I took a look at my Lady Datejust and came up with a quick answer.
“Yes, but I have to go put my Pilotis on, I need to get ready for the show downstairs.”
I could see it all over Jack’s face that he already knew the chemistry. I quickly moved to the elevator making sure to keep my eyes forward. I could feel the sting of the cold stare on the back of my neck. My cold indifference caught up to me and I had nowhere to really run. I hoped he would forget what I looked like, it had been long enough. But I’ll focus on the task at hand first.
I couldn’t say I was disappointed with her, I would walk away from me too. I feel like I may have embarrassed her in front of Jack but that was the last thing on my mind. I was more focused on her shape as she made her way to the elevator. I was focused on her, mesmerised even, by the way those curves sat under that dress. Just as I could begin to think about the way that shape felt, Jack walked up to me with another drink.
“You good man?”
“I’m great actually.”
“So what happened there?”
“Long story, I need to go though, I see Seinfeld over there and he owes me some parts for this 917 I’m building”
Me and my drink made our way across the floor to the entrance to the track on the grounds downstairs, I walked past Seinfeld and went outside to see the new 991’s on display ready for their big debut. I sipped my drink as I stared at the rear-engined stallions bathed in the lights from inside the building. All I could think about is why she didn’t even acknowledge me that day when outside the house. I sat on the grass and tipped my drink into my mouth, trying to make sense out of love.
I walked into my dark office looking out over the courtyard and the party below and stripped off my dress and all the thoughts ripping through my head. I watched myself as I walked over to the window, I could see where his infatuation laid well below my eyes. I want to apologise to him, but I’m not exactly sure how one apologises for what I did. I looked down in the courtyard and saw someone sitting in the grass. It’s him. He’s obviously sad. It’s my fault and right now I don't have anywhere near the words for him.
I backed away from the window trying to resist the urge to cry. I figured he would be here with someone if he showed up. I’ve never been in this position before, nothing to gain, but so much to lose. Fuck that, I need to be downstairs getting ready, they’re going to be herding everybody down there in ten minutes. I pulled on my Nomex suit and grabbed my helmet, and made my way out the door. As I walk through the threshold, still pulling up my zipper, Mark was standing there, obviously drunk.
“What do you need, Mark?”
“I don’t have time for this shit.”
He grabbed my arms and pushed me back into my office. I didn’t really have the energy to fight him, my mind was elsewhere. He began to kiss my neck and I asked:
“So you’re going to do this to me again? Just take what you want from me and I’ll stay quiet and keep my job.”
He started to unzip his pants and continued to bulldoze me towards the desk. I reached up and smacked him across his face, the same face that has dangled over mine one too many times.
“Mark, you’re going to have to find a new girl to use. Cause I’m not the one anymore.”
“Oh, really? You weren’t so adverse to it when I was making you who you are-”
“Fuck you, you didn’t make me. I worked for everything I have, you just made me not believe I could do this on my own.”
“If you’re that stupid, I’ll let you believe that.”
He wobbled out of my office, pants still undone, back downstairs to find someone’s secretary to fuck. I zipped my suit up and grabbed my helmet once again and made my way down to the entrance hall. If anything came of tonight it may be me finding some sense of self-worth.
I was grabbing a drink from the bar when the announcement came through from the DJ booth to head out to the entry hall to take in the night’s real entertainment. I heard the Turbo first, the sound of induction, air being squeezed to oblivion perked up my ears. The GT3 filled my ears next with the raspy burble that only a flat-6 could produce. The cars pulled outside and the crowd followed close behind out to the test track where the cars were set to run. Jack walked up to me with some quip about Road & Track giving him first dibs on the GT3. But I wasn't paying any attention, I was focused on the spectacle of engineering that brought us all together here.
I could see her face twirling around in the sea of rounded shapes and haunches, all the the DNA that created the two great cars exiting in front of us. I really didn’t see them go around the track, my mind ran to the sound our two cars made in the trees leading back to the lake house. A mechanical symphony juxtaposed with the sounds provided by nature, the wind rushing from the water, and lingering in the leaves. Those sounds all collided with the rhythms only love could provide, a pale, round face sipping Malbec intently focused on the soul of another.
The cars stopped and were quickly shooed back into the building once again. The wall of people rushed back into the entrance hall behind the svelte Porsches, and I went along with it. Everything in my being told me to stay away from the car, to never let her see me again, to never hurt my soul the way she did before. So I went back to the bar, grabbed a gin and pineapple, and watched the room avoiding eye contact with anybody. I saw her walk across the crowd, and instantly I made a direct line to her making her entrance onto the elevator. I dont know what came over me until she turned around on the elevator and saw me standing there.
She just stared directly in my eyes, completely silent.
“You’re pretty good at being silent, huh?”
“Only for you, it seems”
“I love you.”
I walked across the elevator and stood right in front of her and she said it again:
“I love you.”
I grabbed her and kissed her soft lips once more. The feeling was still there. The sizzle combined with the flavour of Malbec. The lights illuminating the windows of the house. The love. It was all there. Those two Porsches, one green, one brown, placeholders for two in love for two days.